I was recently discussing with a friend the concept of peace. This discussion was raised from a situation involving a very good friend of mine. We were discussing something that seemed at the time to be the most important thing in the world. We were so very blind. The subject of our discussion is not important, but what is important was that I was on the defensive because I felt insulted, whereas he was on the defensive because he felt wronged. Thus, we came to a situation of arrogance and narcissistically believing that each of our points were the “right.” Consequently, our argument became an event consisting of anger of which led to frustration, and then came the desire to “prove” or “win”–which is pride. This circle of pride–>anger–>frustration–>hate–>selfishness–>pride, which is what causes wars. Christ said, “The spirit of contention is not of me,” and now I truly know why.

This realization of why contention and pride are erroneous came about after our argument. My friend was frustrated with my stubbornness and I with his. So, a third party (another friend) told me about what peace is. He said something to this effect: “peace cannot be achieved when both of your hearts are hardened by pride, because truth and understanding are peace where as hardness causes you to not understand truth. Rather, your own feelings become the only logic you are willing to understand” (paraphrased). Well I thought about the idea of peace and pride for quite sometime after that, and I realized that to achieve truth requires our ability to understand what we perceive to not be true. This is because at times we are not right, even though we believe that we are, and that all we support is true; when in all reality it is not truth and we have only deceived ourselves. That sounds sad, us deceiving ourselves, but it happens. It is not a weakness, rather, it is nature and our state as men and as creatures trying to progress and learn. “Logic” –people argue is the only truth (I have been guilty of that), but one can’t use logic when it is covertly fueled by emotion. If it has no emotion, no bias, not pre-determined solution, then it becomes logic-especially when it is accompanied by a passive understanding of the situation that is being confronted. I must admit I was being very contentious with my friend because I refused to let go of my pride; I don’t hold a grievance or any type of resentment against my friend. However, I do hold one against myself because of my emotions and my pride; I chose to be the cause of a problem and not the solution. –If you are religious– Many of us, as humans, profess to be Christians and love our God, but at times we make the error of not following him and we fall into the error of forgetfulness and neglect. That is what causes many of our errors and misfortunes. Of course we can repair it because we are here to learn and God is very merciful. –If you are not religious– we find that our lack of understanding of our opponent, friend, or objector is a dangerous trap because if we refuse to understand his view even if it is flawed we commit the error of deceiving ourselves by causing us to ignore the counter or dismiss a possible claim of truth.
To conclude, I know now that peace is merely the acceptance of ideas with humility, in order to evaluate them and come to the truth of wether or not I, or my friend is correct and if he is then I must accept and be happy with having found truth, if I am then my friend must do likewise. I have attempted to do this, and it has had much better results because now I have truth, and so dose my friend. I think that is exactly what we need to do to have, and live, happier.
Thank you all,
John